Mouth-Breather Injured In Knob-Swabbing Incident

UNC Sophomore and alleged necrophile Tyler Hansbrough was injured Sunday while knob swabbing. Hansbrough, who earlier last week admitting to enjoying pedicures and butt-sex, said that he lost control of the knob and it came round and hit him in the nose.

Hansbrough said after the game, “You know, in my 2 years here at UNC I’ve taken a lot of shots in the mouth and even one or two in the eye. But this was the first I’ve taken in the nose.”

Here’s to a speedy recovery.

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